Fire!!!

I've been home alone all week. Ashley and Bode left for Florida last Saturday. They return today, and I have to leave in a few minutes to go get them at the airport in Cincinnati. It's only about a 50 minute drive, and Ashley was able to get a direct flight via Cincinnati. This was a much more palatable option than risking flying through Atlanta and possibly getting stuck; traveling with an infant is trying enough without any airport delays. The flight down was uneventful. Ashley said the little dude was in fine spirits--napped on some occasions, ate his food, and played with the distractions Ashley brought with her. I spoke with Ashley all week, and even Skyped with the little man (free video phone over the internet for those stuck in the 20th century). It was fun seeing him; we think he recognized my voice but couldn't quite comprehend the face on the monitor was Daddy. Needless to say, I'm looking forward to seeing the little guy...oh, yes, and of course Ashley :-)

In a few days, I'm sure we'll post a lot of pictures of Bode's first trip to the beach. As a preview, here are some pictures Frank and JoAnne sent me. First, we have Bode getting ready for a swim.He's quite the little Don Juan. Too bad there weren't any chicks around. Of course, hanging with Mama on the water would have certainly cramped his style. Next, we have Bode in a little floatation device. Ashley said she couldn't tell if he liked it or not.Last, we have Bode with his Uncle Jason. Look at the gut on the kid! He better start walking soon because that Budda Belly is unacceptable.I am very much looking forward to Ashley and Bode coming home. The big reason I need them to return lies in the answer to the following question:

While Ashley and Bode were away, Jeff almost burned the house down how many times?

a) None
b) Once
c) Twice

Unfortunately, the answer is c. And I'm not talking about a hard stretch of imagination whereupon the house could've caught fire. There would have been a fire had I not saved the day (of course, there wouldn't have almost been a fire if I weren't such an idiot). How did this happen? Well, the day after Ashley left, I took Auburn for a walk. I was going to make chicken for dinner that night, so to help save time, I starting boiling the chicken right as I was leaving. The walk takes 10-15 minutes so no worries. On the walk, I stopped and starting visiting with some folks (Tony, Emily, and their daughter Lucy). We'd spoken before--said hello, nice weather, etc.--but never really met. Emily waved Auburn and me over, and we had a wonderful little visit. After about 30 minutes, I bolted up from my chair and said, "I'm boiling chicken!" and took off in a mad sprint. Our house is 0.24 miles from Tony's and Emily's (thank you GPS watch). Auburn and I must have covered it in world record time (well, to be honest, the chunky dog was like an anchor during the home stretch). I was so frightened during the run back to the house because when I lived in Iowa, there was a story about a gal who had come home from the bars. She was hungry so she started boiling water and made mac-n-cheese. Unfortunately, she passed out before she finished cooking and she burned her apartment down (she lived, as her roommate woke up and got them both out). I burst into the house expecting to see smoke. A good sign in that there wasn't any. I ran to the kitchen and saw the chicken was boiling but in about 1/2 inch water. Still plenty, but there was about 4 inches when it started...

The second fire episode happened this morning. We have a lamp next to our computer monitor. A couple months ago, the shade broke. Rather than buy a new one (gotta cut costs, man), I rigged the old shade using duct-tape. Last night, I was moving things around the desk and knocked the shade loose. I thought I fixed it, but evidently, I made it so the shade was resting on the light bulb. This morning, I was vacuuming the house (in preparation for Ashley's return) when I smelled something burning. I walked into the office, checked the computer, and then I saw the small line of smoke curling up from the lampshade. I quickly shut the light off and tore the shade away from the bulb. There was about an inch diameter circle of shade-material burned onto the light bulb. Needless to say, it's time to get a new shade.

Well, I'm off to the airport. Before I go, I better make sure the iron is off...

Pleasant day.